I would like to introduce myself to my neighbors off base but am unsure what is tradition.  I read that it is polite to give a gift.  What sort of gift is polite?  I enjoy baking, but am not sure what my neighbors would think about home baked goods from someone they don't know.  Should I just purchase something?  I have at least three neighbors I feel the need to introduce myself to.  Any suggestions would be great.

Thanks,
Rachael

I just had a Japanese neighbor move in next door (in our apartment building.) She brought over a bottle of laundry detergent! So I figured, either she's really polite, or I don't wash my clothes that well. I gave her (and me) the benefit of a doubt. I'm thinking of reciprocating with a box of American chocolates, although I think reciprocation is not expected in this case.

homemade bakery is good gift. 
i m japanese.   they have curious what you are  usually eating

I'm 30's .  American food I ve curious over 20years is  Roasted marshmallows!
because I saw the food  in the 80's movie

Posted By takabell on 01-21-2012 10:01 PM
homemade bakery is good gift. 
i m japanese.   they have curious what you are  usually eating

I'm 30's .  American food I ve curious over 20years is  Roasted marshmallows!
because I saw the food  in the 80's movie

Yes we like toasted marshmallow, especially when camping.  You roast them on the fire, put it on a graham cracker with chocolate.  The hot marshmallow melts the chocolate and you put another cracker on top like a sandwich.  It's delicious!  But would make a terrible house gift. 

We call this recipe Smores, cuz you always want s'more.  Get it!? 

Chocolate is always a big hit. See's is good and not too expensive. When I had new Japanese neighbors move in they brought a mochi gift box with about a dozen assorted flavors.

If you want to do the home baked thing the only thing I would suggest is you make sure to deliver the gift in a box or maybe one of those gift bags you can buy at daiso. I don't think the whole bringing the plate back would be easy to translate. :o)

The traditional gift is the Tenugui which is a small hand towel purchased at a local Japanese dept store, 100 yen shop or similar. Another alternative would be some small household item I.e. previously cited detergent ( "Tide"). About five households would be sufficient.

In AOB we were told that the Japanese love "American" items. Something they can't get off base. They even like american napkins. I think the baked goods is a great idea. My FRG always sells baked goods at our booth on Friendship Day and we make a killing.

We did boxes of Russell Stover chocolates, our neighbors liked them.

We did bath and body hand soaps placed in a nice celophane bag.

Some of my neighbors still bring me things and in return we bake them brownies or breads.
They love our baked goods. We have also made home homemade pasta sauce, pesto, bruchetta etc... in mason jars and they always return th empty jars gift wraped with a thank you note. I think they do this so we make them more...lol Wedo not mind we usually get some great fruit and veggies out of it.

I am horrible about this. We've lived in our house for six month-ish and I haven't introduced myself to our one neighbor. We planned to bring over a Thanksgiving plate, but then we ended up having Thanksgiving on base and weren't home at all that day and gave all our leftovers to the single guys. For Christmas we were gone the whole time, so we didn't bring anything then.

I feel like too much time has gone by now.....so I don't know what to do at this point. Plus, I have some serious anxiety about the language barrier (don't worry, I'm actually taking college-level Japanese classes to combat this anxiety!!)

I think I'm capable of at least introducing myself in Japanese. Our neighbor is a single guy, with a large crate of Sapporo constantly on his doorstep, so I'm assuming some beer and beef jerky might be a good thing, but not sure what the custom is at this point since we're not new to the 'hood...

We tried to introduce ourselves about a week after we moved in, several times. But even though we would see our neighbors arrive home (or on the weekend) they would never answer the bell, and we were stuck standing there with pretty gift bags like idiots. At one point, I saw our neighbor across the way outside, so I ran in to get the bag, and went to her door...and nothing. So we quit trying. Although we are having a hard time here, (our trash keeps getting tossed back on our porch...even PET bottles, a bag filled with NOTHING but water bottles, caps and labels removed! Our housing agent has confirmed several times we are sorting correctly and putting out on the right days, but I will throw it away, and by the time I'm on my front step, someone ( normally the female neighbor on our left ) is pulling out our bag. She just walks over and plops it on the porch without saying anything, even if I'm standing right there and trying to speak to her. So maybe our neighbors just really dislike Americans. The garbage issue is so bad we are thinking of moving onto base (right now, we are walking 3-4 blocks to toss our trash in other bins). Anyways, I don't think too much time has gone by. I know that personally a hello to me from a neighbor would be welcome anytime

That really sux about your neighbor. It's safe to assume they've had a bad experience with American neighbors before, and they're just fed up. Sorry to say the actions of those who came before us reflect back on us, even though we are blameless. You might be able to get your agent and/or housing to talk to the neighbor & see why they keep dumping your trash back at your front door. There is probably some perceived (imagined) infraction and they are determined to be offended no matter what you do. Once confronted by a Japanese, they will probably knock it off. We are pretty good about disposing of our trash properly, but I'd say you are going the extra mile by peeling the labels off the water bottles. Even the Japanese in our neighborhood don't do that!

There is also a "block captain" (I don't know the actual Japanese title.) Their job is the keep the neighborhood functioning smoothly. Your agent probably knows who it is, and could go talk to them to allow the block captain to sort the matter out. That's kinda their job. They could probably also enlighten about past bad experiences in the area with American residents. Maybe one of our regular Japanese contributors can shed light on this approach.

In our apartment building, we only had one neighbor who answered the door. There is a house next door, and we were able to introduce ourselves to the lady who lives there. As for the rest of the neighbors, we enjoyed their chocolates and rarely see them. We haven't had anyone act so unpleasantly towards us, it's a shame that your experience has been so bad.

Posted By MonsterMommie on 01-22-2012 6:33 PM

...our trash keeps getting tossed back on our porch...even PET bottles, a bag filled with NOTHING but water bottles, caps and labels removed! 

I just asked my wife about this, as she is Mistress of the Gomi in our household.  She tells me each little town is different, but here in Iwakuni we cannot throw away PET bottles with the trash.  They have to go to recycle bins at the grocery store.  For a year, she was doing it wrong until she read the instructions more carefully. 

Yoko could well be different, but look into this.  Maybe PET bottles are the exception?

I'm trying to decide if I have had really amazing agents or if you all just have bad ones. Both times I have moved into a place in town my agent came and took me around and introduced me to the neighbors.

MonsterMommie - you really need to get your agent out to the house to talk to this neighbor. That kind of behaviour is just insane.


Thaiguy - Yoko IS different. PET 1 bottles go out on the same day as glass and cans. (http://www.city.yokosuka.kanagawa.j...index.html  pamphlet #2)

Posted By MonsterMommie on 01-22-2012 6:33 PM
We tried to introduce ourselves about a week after we moved in, several times. But even though we would see our neighbors arrive home (or on the weekend) they would never answer the bell, and we were stuck standing there with pretty gift bags like idiots. At one point, I saw our neighbor across the way outside, so I ran in to get the bag, and went to her door...and nothing. So we quit trying. Although we are having a hard time here, (our trash keeps getting tossed back on our porch...even PET bottles, a bag filled with NOTHING but water bottles, caps and labels removed! Our housing agent has confirmed several times we are sorting correctly and putting out on the right days, but I will throw it away, and by the time I'm on my front step, someone ( normally the female neighbor on our left ) is pulling out our bag. She just walks over and plops it on the porch without saying anything, even if I'm standing right there and trying to speak to her. So maybe our neighbors just really dislike Americans. The garbage issue is so bad we are thinking of moving onto base (right now, we are walking 3-4 blocks to toss our trash in other bins). Anyways, I don't think too much time has gone by. I know that personally a hello to me from a neighbor would be welcome anytime

MM,

sometimes you just have  a$$ holes. 

Probably they will not let anybody who is not in the gorup put trash in the container.  I had that problem right after I moved into my house (I bought it, not rental) and the local group tried that with me.  They were useing it as a tool to force you to join their group.  One phone call to the trash company and the local Koban cleared that problem right up. 

The container is provided (in my area) by the trash company, so unless you are putting it out on the wrong days/incorrectly sorting it they cannot refuse you the use of it as the local group does not "own" it per se. 


I would deffinitely start with the Fudosan and work my way up the chain, and I would not wait, waiting empowers them and makes them bolder.

Ken, is "Fudosan" the actual title of the person I was trying to describe as block captain? Can you explain more about this role? How is the person selected, and what are their responsibilities?

Fudo-san is Japanese for "realtor".

Thanks everyone for your input. I'll be sure to post back and let you know results of our introductions. I got a few books from the library today about culture, so maybe I'll get more ideas from them as well. I love to bake, so I'll probably go with some homemade bread, cake, or cookies. For those of you who have had issues with your neighbors, I hope it all turns around for you. Just remember to always be the better person regardless of the situation.

Posted By ThaiGuy on 01-23-2012 10:51 AM
Ken, is "Fudosan" the actual title of the person I was trying to describe as block captain? Can you explain more about this role? How is the person selected, and what are their responsibilities?

Thaigai

Sorry for not getting back about this, as above the Fudo San is the Realator.  the block captains responsibilities depend entirely upon what that particular block decides they will be.  it can be as simple as setting the schedule for who will clean the trash pickup location to very involved where they are responsible for calling into the city office for say street light lamp replacement or roadside cleanup etc.   it really depends upon that particular block.

With that in mind you can also get some for whom it turns into a power trip.  I have in the past had to deal with one or two like that.    you need to be creative to deal with them 

kenn

MonsterMommie, I agree with ThaiGuy. Probably a previous neighbor has given them a "bad taste" about Americans living in their neighborhood. Have your agent go out and talk to the neighbors to see what the prolem is. That is a shame and sounds like they are trying to "bully" you out of the neighborhood. I hope this experience has not spoiled your perception of the Japanese people. Many are amazing people.
I myself have been blessed to have nothing but wonderful neighbors. Just one of many examples is when we had to leave Japan after the Earthquake last March. The company my husband works for told us we had to leave and go back to the U.S until they felt it was ok to return. With only a couple days notice to get things together, we decided to leave my car in the driveway and take my husbands car to the airport. The morning we left, of course it was pouring rain. We pulled my car out and parked it on a sidestreet while we pulled his car in the driveway to load it with our cats and luggage. It wasn't until after arriving in the States, getting a good nights sleep, my husband sat straight up out of a sound sleep and said "We forogt to put your car back in the driveway!" With not knowing if my car would even be there, or if it got towed, to where or how to get it (and the cost) we just figured it was a loss. I emailed a Japanese friend from the first neighborhood where we lived. (Had to move houses after the owner of house #1 returned to Japan and wanted to live in his house again)and told her we had accidently forgot to pull the car back in. My old neighbor then called her Auto club (similar to AAA) and had my car towed and put back into our driveway the same day I e-mailed her. I then got an e-mail from her telling me not to worry, it was taken care of. I burst into tears thanking God for such wonderful neighbors! I could not believe they had spent their day, time fixing my goof up. Needless to say, I bought all neighbors (old neighborhood and new one that were involved) a nice gift from the States as a Thank You. They even took out my umbrella and an old sweater I keep in the car (just incase) as safekeeping since they could not lock the car.
Hopefully if they can get the neighbors straightened out, you will be able to have a great experience living in the wonderful Country. Good luck...let us know what happens!

We were unable to resolve the issue, so now are moving into a tower on base on the 6th of March. I had really hoped to have everything sorted out, but even after having our housing agency speak to our neighbors on your behalf, the garbage issue is still going on. I am pretty upset we are now moving out of a 2800 sq.ft home (with a guest house!) to live in an apartment, but at this point it is our only option. We can't keep throwing our trash in other bins blocks away. Thanks for the advice, and I wish our neighborhood had been more accepting!

So sorry to hear that! I was wondering what, if anything had happened. My husband said make sure you report it to Housing, and they should not rent that house anymore to Americans. So what did the neighbors tell the agent? The agent should have been able to give you SOME answer. Good luck on your move

MonsterMommie - wow that really sucks. Hopefully the rest of your time in Japan will be issue free.

(Make sure you let housing know about all the problems you had, sounds like maybe that place should not be rented to Americans.)

Yeah, that's crummy. Your neighbors don't know how lucky they were to have someone nice like you living there. Had it been me, I would have stayed out of spite & made sure they knew how unhappy I was with their attitude (midnight bundles of trash at their door, etc.) I'm really sorry you got forced out like this; discrimination is alive & well in Japan.

A number of years ago while living in Sasebo , we complained to housing about our water heater which kept breaking during winter. The landlord was not pleased. While I was underway, the tires to our car were flattened. My wife opted to move then two months later we were moved onbase.

We did let housing know, and the agent only told us that they spoke to the neighbors, all of whom denied bringing our trash back to our steps ( of course ). Ah well, we got into Ume tower, and I am trying to look on the bright side. No more having to push my bike up all these hills with a toddler on the back and the basket full of groceries! And no more garbage!! Although I'm really going to miss the bakery down the street. My sons and I love walking there after playing at the parks and getting treats.