It seems like a lot of guys on this site like to "stir the pot."  I read, but take none of them seriously.  Perhaps, they like all the attention they get online.  I choose not to take anything they say personally.  And, why would I?  They don't know me.  They may make a lot of generalizations about women, but what do I care?  Sometimes it's just easier to know that men will be men (or should I say boys will be boys).....I don't have to like all of them.  All I know is that I got a good man in my life, and that's all that matters to me.

Softballwidow - like the new avatar pic!  

Westpac - I have to admit....I did kinda find the caveman picture amusing!  Was that you in your previous life?! 

Softballwidow....HILARIOUS!!!!

Explain to me why a lot of men who are with Japanese women still cheat on them and treat them bad? Because no matter what, there are just some men who can't control themselves no matter how good a woman treats them.

If "no matter what"... then why the need to specify "Japanese" in the first statement. If your 2nd statement is true, it is totally 100% irrelevant if they are Japanese or not.

Men that cheat are likely to cheat regardless of whom they marry. It has not jack crap to do with the nationality.

You know why JN's are preferable? Because they don't visit the same websites and argue with your dumb ass...

U know what? Let the Japanese women have the sloppy seconds... UGGGH>... Anyway, what did u cook today?

It's time for some clarity. In days of yore when men went to sea on ships and the womenfolk stayed behind to tend the little ones and the chores, we would practice a time honored tradition called "Busting Balls". This amounted to us speaking to one another in most terrible manner heaping upon each other all matter of insults and degradation. It seldom led to actual physical harm although an occasionally some would get pretty tight jawed for a spell. This was a process of male bonding and contributed to developing mental toughness for dealing for those occasions when we might have to deal with serious business. Even after we rotate ashore or retire, we tend to continue this practice to show one another respect. We are showing you Ladies the utmost respect by treating you like one of the guys. So toughen up, knock off the whining and grow a pair.<3<3<3 BTW I think Pretpink is getting with the program.

Oh please, don't be so patronizing. It's pretty easy for everyone to tell the difference between who is busting balls and who is being completely serious.

I think half your post have been in jest, but the other sh*t wasn't, don't try to backpedal. Lol.

Posted By Westpac Wayfarer on 04 Mar 2010 06:14 PM 
We are showing you Ladies the utmost respect by treating you like one of the guys. So toughen up, knock off the whining and grow a pair.<3<3<3 BTW I think Pretpink is getting with the program.

Hmmmmm.....I'm almost buying it.  I can kinda picture you guys having private conversations together, and trying to figure out what to post next that's going to get us in an uproar.  I can just forsee the next forum post buy our residents Ball Busters.

How about: "I'm not going to have sex with my wife until she looses that extra 5 lbs of pregnancy weight"

mmm
I'm an Asian American girl, so I grew up with both cultures.... I also majored in Japan studies so I have some background in understanding their way of life.

I think I have to agree that American women are more forward, independent, and outspoken. From what I've seen after living here for several years and from my studies, it appears to me that Japanese women care for their husbands a lot - housewifely duties..etc., family oriented, but I wouldn't say independent (if they are, then it's a minority). I see a lot of women not return to work after they marry, they stay home to raise the kids.

Both sides have their plus and minuses. I frankly find American women much more attractive precisely due to their independence and outspoken voice. Women like Hillary Clinton inspire me to be more. I think American women are stronger and more dependable in terms of a career (for example if you lost a job, you could rely on the wife to be the breadwinner). The same, I think, would be very rare to be said for Japanese women in general just because of the way Japanese society is set to be male dominated. I don't think the feminist movement is that strong here in Japan, it is still very much traditional.

Regarding the "fat American women", I think that also applies to American men, and yes we do have a problem with obesity that we're battling as a nation. It's unfortunate, but I think we should learn a thing or two from the Japanese - they're constantly moving (not sedentary), whether walking or on bike. Keep in mind, when I say "American" that includes all the people living in America (caucasian/black/hispanic/asian, etc). But you know what, there are lots of overweight Japanese people too (not in Tokyo so much, but same thing in places like New York or Santa Monica). Keep your eye open when you go to Seiyu or a market and you can count lots of overweight Japanese men and women.

I also agree with the other posters that the military men marry Japanese women more because of the numbers game. There are more of them here in Japan than America, so naturally it is easier to meet. But I also personally think that living in a local area can change your tastes & preferences. When I was living in America, all I could think about was white guys. White guys were so hot and sexy. Their height, wide chest, colored eyes and just, everything about them made me flustered. Now that I'm in Japan, I oddly and suddenly find Japanese men to be irresistibly attractive. Their mysterious and quiet demeanor, combined with the kimono, and the black eyes make me melt. They're not as tall or have as wide a chest (usually they're skinny and gaunt looking), but something about their elegance is so hot. Funny isn't it? I'm Asian and I never thought seeing a fellow Asian could be "exotic". I have "yellow fever" I guess... anyway, point is that it appears to me that the local population is hotter when it's made available.

My 2 cents.

Very nice post, Emily.

Posted By Elizabeth on 03-04-2010 3:28 PM

"American women want what they want and will not settle for less."

And so what? All the guys on here obviously have some standard they're holding their woman to.

Actually, no.

And there's your Relationships Insight clue for the day.

Men & Women.  We do NOT think like each other.

I am an Asian-American woman and have lived in different Asian countries (Korea, Japan, Philippines) as well as several U.S. states (Cali, Hawaii, Nevada). I think it depends on your upbringing. From my experience, I seem to be considered most attractive by Caucasian and African American males no matter where I live--even when I live in an area where Caucasians and AA men are the minority, such as Hawaii or even here in Japan.

However! The standard of beauty in Asia is very different from that of the typical American. For example, Asians are all about skin whitening whereas in the U.S. all of my lady friends (even my Asian friends who were raised non-traditionally) love to hit the beach or tanning salon to tan. Also, Asian women tend to be pretty petite as a whole. I am 5'2" and am considered healthy at 125 pounds or so in the U.S. (I weightlift too so I looked leaner/lighter when I was that weight), but when I visited family here I was actually considered chubby or heavy. My own mom was 96 pounds when she was my age, and we have a similar frame and height. Also in the U.S. there seems to be an emphasis to look sexy and mature, whereas my experience in Asia is that it is preferable to look young and cute.

I know Asian males who are ONLY attracted to Caucasian females, and have even known men who are strictly attracted to Asians or blondes or (insert other trait/race here). Even the famous Japanese singer, Gackt, is dating or married to one and reportedly prefers them.

TL;DR - People are attracted to what is exotic or different. Maybe it's a 'the grass is greener on the other side' mentality, or maybe it's a novelty thing. Or hell, maybe you really are just into Japanese women--either their looks, or maybe you just like how the sweet and cute thing. *shrug*

For the record, I think women of EVERY race are beautiful. Every ethnic group has something beautiful and different to offer. I agree though that it all depends on good genes, how a woman dresses or carries herself and acts towards others, and of course one's health and personal effort. For me a "simple" woman who is kind and humble is more beautiful than one a supermodel beauty with a nasty disposition.

Posted By emily28 on 04-09-2013 2:04 AM

I think I have to agree that American women are more forward, independent, and outspoken.

I see you've never met my Japanese wife.

The answer is not so much the appearance but in the cultural difference which creates an individual whose attitudes and deportment towards the opposite sex is quite different from what American Men are used to in the U.S. Another point is that a Japanese-American woman may have the same DNA as her indigenous counterpart but that is where the similarity ends. Of course, it would be nice to hear from a Japanese-Japanese woman for her assessment.

Posted By Jocelin on 04-09-2013 10:48 AM

TL;DR - People are attracted to what is exotic or different. Maybe it's a 'the grass is greener on the other side' mentality, or maybe it's a novelty thing. Or hell, maybe you really are just into Japanese women--either their looks, or maybe you just like how the sweet and cute thing. *shrug*

'Cause we are all shallow like that.

But, you hit the nail on the head .    It has nothing to do with personality, compatibility and love. 

Posted By Johnny Seattle on 04-09-2013 11:17 AM
The answer is not so much the appearance but in the cultural difference which creates an individual whose attitudes and deportment towards ...

You forgot  "cute and sweet".

Cute, sweet & charming 

I think I have to agree that American women are more forward, independent, and outspoken.

These are under the "good" qualities section?

My assessment of women - having had experienced the full range of famillial and romantic relationships on both sides of the pond - is that they are pretty much the same all over.

Don't be fooled into thinking Japanese women are passive - they rule the roost and are not shy at all in telling you what they think. The fact they don't tell you everything they think within five minutes after meeting you is cultural and not due to gender. My Japanese wife has been known to bust my a$$ with decent regularity (not to say it's not deserved!).

"What is it about Japanese Women?" Can this be explained with also examining the other side of the coin?
What is it about American Men? (from the Japanese Woman perspective). What is it about us that they find so irresistible?

Posted By Jocelin on 04-09-2013 10:48 AM
However! The standard of beauty in Asia is very different from that of the typical American. For example, Asians are all about skin whitening whereas in the U.S. all of my lady friends (even my Asian friends who were raised non-traditionally) love to hit the beach or tanning salon to tan. Also, Asian women tend to be pretty petite as a whole.

This very true. I have seen this, although it is not openly discussed but through their actions. For example, in acceptable to use an umbrella when it is not raining for protection against the heat and direct sunlight. Sun block can get pretty expensive. 

Posted By Jocelin on 04-09-2013 10:48 AM
 
For me a "simple" woman who is kind and humble is more beautiful than one a supermodel beauty with a nasty disposition.

I wholeheartedly agree w/ you!    (By the way, you write well.)