I can't count how many times I've walked into the Yokosuka Navy Exchange and I've seen countless congregations of Navy wives blocking the aisles, flapping their gums while their screaming children run around unattended. I mean, I understand that people socialize and all that, but please have some consideration to the fact that you're in a public place and there are other people trying to get things done. How many other people are sick and tired of seeing this?

I won't say it's just the Navy wives though... I have seen it countless times and mostly it is children that I have noticed, but sometimes you have several Sailors too. What gets me most is that they look at you like you bothered them by saying "excuse me". I would much rather yell "MOVE", but don't think they would be as quick to respond.

I have not ever really been bothered by the spouses doing what you say at the NEX, the Sailors however who dont know how to talk and behave in public is a problem I do see. Women and children all over the place and they use F words and such like it is okay to do so, I know cursing like a sailor is the term but they should know when and where to do it (alone with only others of like language). After all I like the addage "people use curse words as fillers when they lack something intelligent to say". I mean yes I may do it too now and then but never in that setting where the little ones can pick it up. Class is something you cant instill but has to be learned. Too bad there are people everywhere, not just here, who simply have never enrolled in the learning process. Of course the NEX is one of the main places where folks run into each other so of course they are going to socialize.

yokosailor, you make a very valid point, and I appreciate the feedback, but there is a separate forum for sailors using foul language in public places.

Seriously Keith?? You are asking for trouble. I can't believe you posted this? LOL

This is Lisa. Not Shawne. Now he's going to be pissed because I posted something under his name..owell.

Haha, yeah you just opened Pandora's box...

Part of the problem is the size of the NEX trying to fill the needs of so many, inclement weather and Mom's having no where to take their kids so the end up in the NEX and socialize, and well, people just being people. For every wife that annoys you, I can guarantee there is a sailor annoying that wife. Should parents be more mindful of their kids? Sure, but like you said, they are in a public place and well, things happen. Not to tell you your complaint isn't valid, but also a lot of these Mom's have been without their husband's for a while, are tired and seeing another Mom and talking for a few minutes in the store keeps them somewhat sane. Not saying they are totally valid in letting their kids run loose. Personally, my kids are allowed to roam free in the toy aisles ( I stay in the aisle with them) but if we head out to say electronics or clothing, they have to be right with me.

Let's remember that the function of this base and all the units on it are to support the ACTIVE DUTY SERVICE MEMBER, not dependents. I personally believe that dependents have very little to make vaild complaints about. You are overseas, suck it up.

Someone sounds bitter towards dependents, it seems to me the the SUPPORT you refer to is not just ACTIVE DUTY SERVICE MEMBERS, else we would not have a CDC, 3 and 4 bedroom housing, a labor and delivery ward, kids sports programs, family movie theatre, a Fleet and FAMILY service center etc. If a member has unhappy, disgruntled, and disregarded family members with the I dont care suck it up support system the problems will cause the member to be distracted from doing their job. You are an old retired guy that is now just a civilian here, do you really take the suck it up attitude from others? As a non military member should you not have very little to make complaints about? You are overseas.....suck it up yourself....quit crying about everything....I mean dude, you post a lot of wining and complaining yourself...

I have also heard sailors in uniform throwing out the F word. I understand that they are sailors and my husband is guilty of the F word alot too, but he doesn't stand in the aisles of the Nex with his name plastered on his shirt and pants cussing and bsing so loud that I can hear it half way across the NEX. I have no problem with spouses in the NEX. Kids are going to be kids. I have 2 so it hardly ever bothers me to see kids having a fit in the NEX. I've been there. I think we are all stuck here and we are forced to sucks it up as slickster said. I think we should just all try to put ourselves in another's shoes before we become so judgemental. I approached a loud group of Chiefs, yes Chiefs who were cussing and carrying on and I asked them to please mind their language that they were not on a ship. They quickly apologized and told me they had just run into an old buddy and got carried away. They lowered their voices and were more mindful of their language and were still able to bs with their old friend. I think it's all about compromise.

@slickster The facilities overseas are for all those who are assigned overseas. Unless the location specifies no dependents (e.g., NAVCENT and Korea, recently) than those dependents have EXACTLY the same right and need to use those facilities as the active duty personnel. Plus, if you think that dependents play no role in the support of active duty personnel, you are missing quite a bit.

I think the valid points made in this discussion are that customers at the limited-space shared-use facilities should be more aware of their impact on their surroundings and on the people with whom they share space. There's only one NEX and one Commissary for everyone, and they're not that big. To claim it's all the fault of Navy wives or foul-mouthed sailors is probably inaccurate and definitely not helpful.

well once again when your on a military installation you should expect military memebers to act like military members and that includes swearing and talking about dirty things you wives should put your shoes our shoes and see why we swear a lot

Damn Jaw lol yea I see them all woman/NUB's/ amd teenagers all standing in my f****** way everytime i go to the NEX. When no one is looking and a kid runs by you just stick out a toe and be rewarded for your troubles. lol as for us sailors use bad words and such...dont throw stones in a glass house because some of those moms be on fire in the nex. Things will never change so I have to limit my time in the NEX and only go if I really really need something.
-oh and just because your hubby is gone on deployment for months at a time..whoopy fin dooooo!!! You surface guys get to make phone calls and have email while underway!!! WTF Submarines once, submarines twice!!!

Holy jumping J---- C-----, Phone calls and emails? You mean they don't have to go weeks at a time completely out of contact? And they still cry about it? I'm sure that's just skimming the surface, though. But one other thing.... I don't remember a wife being issued to me when I got my sea bag.

Yup, sweet sunshine, steel beach BBQ's, we even get mail now and then....lay out in the sun to keep the tans, oh liberty ports, you should see those, oops sorry, you dont get the good ones....well at least you get sub pay right, compensation for the life of living in a tube?! With only your guy friends, sharing beds....sounds wonderful....

Don't forget about getting suckered into accepting orders to "shore duty" in Japan, where we have to deal with the skimmers and their retarded families.....

lol Its funny we always tell the nukes thats why you get propay. Shame o you sir...japan aint so bad keith. Not everyone has what it takes to be a cut above the rest lol hey think of it this way, when a NUB cant cut it on a SUB because its to tough where do we send him?

And i dont want none of you Navy wives runnin up on me in the streets over this B.S. It's just jokes...no really I got one bleeding gash to worry about of my own I aint got time to hear your complaints about my post...

Hey, be glad it isn't walmart.

http://peopleofwalmart.com

lmao well played Brian.

Not all wives are that bad, some of us just like to go to the Commissary and the Exchange, do what we need to do and get the hell out! I also can't stand people griping about their situations, we chose to be here after all, we're not being forced to stay... as for the cursing and stuff, I totally get we are on a military base and this par for the course (I am def. guilty of it myself but usually at home) but I have pulled up people before for being too loud with the cursing, if they have to curse, then fine, but there is no need to sound like a megaphone as well.... I was warned when I first became a military wife that a lot of women tend to bitch and moan about their situation and dig at their husbands etc. and I vowed never to do this! I know my husband works his butt off, but I found out how to get to base by train, I got the kids into day care, I can shop in town, I take the kids to the hospital when its needed, I attend classes at the FFS, I am job searching too - so I am doing what I need to do to keep busy and do things without having to bother my husband with stuff!
Thank heavens for online shopping....

Yokosailor,
You need to understand what "fleet support" is dependent support is something entirely different, I think you also nee to re-look at "forward deployed also. As for complaining, I'm not, I'm just offering my thoughts, but you are right I have little to complain about, I'm paid extremely well with many benefits as a civilian to do a job that used to be done by a second class. I'm kind of glad the Navy focuses on issues like these instead of warships, it ensures that I will continue to have a job.

All I know is, the next time I'm in the store and a kid slams into me because they're using those stupid sneakers with the skates on the bottom, lord help the parent responsible for them. They don't say "excuse me/sorry", or anything!

Ok, good banter, what kind of job does the navy pay so well for that a second class used to do? Just curious, I may be looking for one soon...

Yokosailor,
PMS,reading micrometer,all sorts of good things that sailors previuosly were forced to learn but mainly I just got to the ship or send an email telling them where to look in the tech manual. Shortly after that I usually get a call from the saying A. they don't have time. B. they don't understand the material. C. (my favorite), we don't have any tools or the tech manual you mentioned.
I will give you a bit of advice, if you plan on getting out of the military and working in or around what you do in the military then only take orders to billets that are in your rate. Out rate jobs or full time "collateral duties" are useless after your active time is up.
I have had to turn many people away because of this, for example, an MM1 with ten years in the navy and ten years AC&R experince will get the job before an MMCM who has spent the last fifteen years palying CMC or DAPA.

We take our wives away from their families in the states, put them in a small town with 3 shopping stores, and then expect them not to "congregate" in the isles. SO WHAT?! Would you rather them be out there shopping in Tokyo at those expensive stores? As good as we all have it here, and we do have it good, there really isn't much for our wives to do. This is a nice meeting spot for them and it is a welcome privilege for some. I have never experienced an issue with people moving to the side when I say, "excuse me".
So now, with your little forum here, our "Navy Wives" are going to feel even more uncomfortable when they have to go out. Thanks a lot.
Do you want to know what I am sick and tired of? The constant complaining of people here in Japan. When was the last time anyone has been in the states? There isn't this kind of protection and convenience anywhere! And, how about the constant cursing around our little ones? Or the walking and smoking around them also? Maybe if we watch ourselves instead of worrying about petty things, like say a mother of a child finally finding someone to talk to and it happens to be in the store, we would see that things aren't so bad after all.

I thought this was going to be about a new TV show they're selling at the NEX, like Army Wives or something. Hahaha.

hmm. well i was looking at these posts because my husband got shore duty and we are moving here in may 2010. I was excited, but some of these posts are a bit overwhelming, is it really all this anger at each other? I spent my time active duty overseas and I don't remember all this resentment.

Deamarie dont worry, someone just put sand in her clam. Its really not that bad, what Mommy and her friends should do is meet at someones house aaor at a park, that way they dont take up space. On a sub we call people like that NUB's. Its not a big deal iff I come walking through and have to ask someone to move its just that I have to do it every 5-6 feet over and over and over. Then when the boats are in...forget about it cause then its not just moms its everyone who doesnthave anything better to do. WE ARE IN JAPAN GO OUT AND TOWN AND SEE SOME SHIT. There are plenty of places for them to meet and greet, so why waist the time doing it in a place were people who have work to do but need to get some last minute shopping done or people who been at work all day dealing with the BS, then have to come in the NEX and listen to some screaming ass kids and random chit chat about nothing important to humanity...I'm just sayin.

Some people are just a little too touchy when they know they are in the wrong. There are PEOPLE (not just wives) who don't watch their children and just let them run rampid and don't think about anyone but themselves. Some get a little too comfortable since the probability of their kids getting snatched up are less likely on base as it is off base in the states. There's nothing wrong with stopping to chat as long as you are mindful to everyone around you. Unfortunatly, not everyone has common courtesy. I don't let it get to me...some people are raised differently.

With the mass amounts of people shopping for the Christmas Season, I agree that congregating in the aisles can be annoying. However, If I was in the states, and I ran into a friend I would probably talk with them in the aisle as well. I've lived here 3 years, and can't go anywhere in Ikego or Yokosuka without seeing someone I know, therefore the situation is going to arise where you will make small talk. A simple excuse me should work for getting by. I also don't think it's just Navy Wives. I've gotten trapped many times in the beer section by a group of young sailors stocking up for the weekend and discussing rather graphically their conquests the night before. Heaven forbid my husband see someone he plays Softball with......we'll be there all day.

I'd take the Navy wives shopping at the NEX, and day over the shoppers at a South Texas Walmart anyday. They don't move when you say excuse me.


*in total agreement about the Heeleys in the stores. I don't think any kids should be able to wear them. They are so annoying.

How about this one?

"I can't count how many times I've walked into the Yokosuka Navy Exchange and I've seen countless congregations of sailors blocking the aisles, flapping their gums while their foul language bothered people around. I mean, I understand that people socialize and all that, but please have some consideration to the fact that you're in a public place and there are other people trying to get things done. How many other people are sick and tired of seeing this?"

Yeah, I know, this is a Navy base...it's normal to use foul language out loud in public in front of children. But spouses in the NEX...OMG, who do they think they are to bother us?!?

Get over it. The NEX caters to both active duty personnel AND families (of active duty personnel). Surely, there must be things more important to worry about than this...

There's always been an ongoing war between the member and the dependent for as long as I can remember. I actually had two different groups of female friends - military and dependents. The dependents hated my military friends because being attractive automatically meant they were sleeping with someone's husband, and the members always hated my dependent friends because even though they had NO kids, they always managed to come up with an excuse not to work. Ahhh, Norfolk.

At home I always shopped somewhere other than the Commissary...here I'm not so lucky, especially if I have American food on my list.
The whole store's just one big mess. People don't know what side of the aisle they want to walk on. Some people have a cart-full of food and fly around the corner without thinking "Well hey...MAYBE there's a human on the other side." Some are on their phones because God forbid they bring home french-cut green beans instead of "the norm". Some don't even look up while they're en route - apparently grocery lists are equipped with not only GPS, but collision detection as well.

I'd like to request two things, please...

1) Do not let your kids push the cart, especially if they can't SEE over the cart. I'm 5'5", 120lbs. I'm small, but damnit, I'm visible. I've been hit twice in the very small number of times I've forced myself into that store. The kid never appologized, and the parent just kept on truckin.

2) If the self checkout machines in any way, shape, or form confuse you, PLEASE just suck it up and have your things checked out for you. It's not the 45 Items or Less that aggravates me, it's the people that have maybe 10 items...all of them have bar codes, nothing complicated...and somehow or another it ends up confusing the crap out of them, and they require assistance. Grab, scan, bag, repeat.
Or, once again, letting the kids help with the checkout when they can barely even reach. I'm all for educating young minds, but not when it's after the work day, and people are just trying to grab dinner and get the hell home. I don't have the patience after work for little Emily to figure out what sound a piggy makes when she's trying to scan the bacon.

The Commissary aisles should have one-way arrows to avoid the crashes. That could be done with $5 worth of duct tape.

The duct tape arrows would have to be a fluorescent color of some sort and flashing. And 3D.


I'd still probably get hit.

I don't have the patience after work for little Emily to figure out what sound a piggy makes when she's trying to scan the bacon.

Very Funny!!! Oink, Oink...

all leads back to one thing.... the brats on this base are outta control.

"well once again when your on a military installation you should expect military memebers to act like military members and that includes swearing and talking about dirty things you wives should put your shoes our shoes and see why we swear a lot"

What we should expect is for military members to act PROFESSIONALLY, and that includes (ESPECIALLY) behavior AWAY from the ship. Situational awareness. You want to act like some foul version of a 1960's Sailor, do it on the ship. There is no place for it in today's Navy and certainly not in public.

Besides, what makes you think that people on here are NOT either active duty or retired? In 20+ years of military service, and in the 4 years since I retired, I can not recall ONE requirement that said acting like military members required behaving like an idiot in public. If anything, it was specifically frowned upon. And don't give me that "why we swear a lot" crap. You think you're the only one to have ever done what your doing?

This "on a military base, we can act like we want" type of attitude is WHY you/your fellow shipmates ended up back in a liberty card program. It was great without it, and then the INAPPROPRIATE and IDIOTIC behavior is why the USN ended up going back on it in the FDNF. Congratulations. Your not only part of the problem, you're contributing to the lack of a solution.


Edited to remove some of the venom from my original post.

Posted By Rotsa Ruck on 10 Dec 2009 06:35 PM
The Commissary aisles should have one-way arrows to avoid the crashes. That could be done with $5 worth of duct tape.

Maybe they could be labeled: "Go this F**king way, you lazy spouse, foul mouth sailor, or bitter civilian." And perhaps additional signs could be posted for congergation or meeting areas. Everyone would be happy then.

I love how people decided to pick the most inconvenient places to stop and chit chat to their friends. I just want to walk around with my elbows sticking out half the time so when people run into me it's gonna flippin hurt and they might decide to look up every now and then. I don't think traffic lights or any sort of system can help half the people I see in the nex.

"HEY LETS STAND IN EVERYONE'S WAY WHO IS TRYING TO GET TO THE ELECTRONIC SECTION!!"

Thats when "red rover red rover" comes into mind, but obviously I can't do that.

So, I was just in the states and happened to be at Walmart and I was walking around the corner where the wine coolers and other frosty beverages were and there were 3 young ladies fairly spread out at the end of the aisle. I had enough room to walk through them comfortably and without getting close to touching either of them and one of them had the audacity to tell me to say excuse me. I was baffled by it. I mean I would understand if I had to duck, dip, dive or dodge out their way but I didn't. If it aint one thing it's another. You can't fix stupid.

Funny- you used Wal-Mart and stupid in the same paragraph  Go figure.

Agree with Rotsa- The arrows would make things easier, it's not like it hasn't been done before. The Commissary in Dam Neck was like that.

Unfortunately it comes down to common courtesy. For some they don't know what that is b/c they didn't have any home training. Does that excuse them no; ignorance is not an excuse.

There is a common theme of Quid pro quo, all parties involved are guilty of clogging up the isles at Nex or Commissary et.al. So I could really care less about the mud slinging in either direction. Everyone's sh*t stinks.

There is something to be said about chatting in a high traffic common area: Catch up real quick, exchange phone numbers, make plans to meet at the park with the kiddies etc. Then MOVE on. It's a small base; you'll see them again.

i think every body does it  you just have some poeple with manners and some where raised in a barn

I agree, its not just the wives (even though we do do it too), but how many times do I have to say excuse me to a large group of young sailors to get around them? And then I get looked at like I'm rude. And also- is it just me or there A LOT of spouse/dependent bashing on this site?

Elise..it's not just you. If you complain about it you will be told to just not read it. It's hard to do, so I requested a block feature and admin has put it on the 'to do' list. Seems to be only a few individuals...but those few really stand out so the only way to avoid it is to block them.

Tammy, here's how society works. There are many different people from all different walks of life. If you cannot accept this, go back to your sheltered life.

Looks like someone got his wittle feewings hurt..haha

Seriously, just because people don't want to read trash(and that's what some of it is), doesn't mean they live a sheltered life. I thought this site was intended to get and give USEFUL information. Bashing others just makes the good contributors lleave.

I thought this site was intended to get and give USEFUL information.

I can assure you it is intended for this purpose. I know we have a few people that want to act like idiots from time to time, but people are people. I think we have gotten rid of a fare share of the rotten apples, and I can assure you I have already deleted over 300 accounts since June 1, 2009. Anytime people start to cross the line, I give them a warning, but then I ban them. I will tell you if you get banned, I dont just ban you, but I re-direct you everytime you visit this website to a PORN SITE. My little joke, for you to stay away..

Come on folks. I just had to delete a persons post.
Can we all just get along!!!

If you want to bash one another, take it to PROFANITY ALLOWED section, so others that read the public forums dont have to read all that crap, and bashing..

Bottom line.... accept that there are people in this world with differing opinions than yours.